#aplatonics are queer

[itsoktocallmegay]

Friendly reminder that aplatonics are queer. It’s so disheartening to see so much aphobia be directed towards aplatonics. The A includes all aspecs.

[cloudboundcritters]

"we need more weird queers!!"

you start parroting TERF talking points the milisecond someone says they are a lesboy or gaygirl

you cry when mspec lesbians/gays exist

you refuse to use neopronouns or it/its, even when those are a persons only set of pronouns

you expect a-specs to experience attraction in some way (yes, that includes platonic attraction)

you exclude intersex people

you can't even accept furries.

[bored-boring-and-tired]

i propose that instead of pride month, we have queer year (queer people are treated like actual people all year long)

edit: @ilackhumanqualities wins best addition to this post

[styrofauxm]

Honestly, I am pretty frustrated by the "haha why would anyone hate ace people" responses to Rowling's tweet.

Don't get me wrong, the support is nice. But if you want to be an ally, you have to do so on our terms, not yours. And that means actually engaging with the aspec community, not just posting positivity every now and again. And what those responses highlight to me is what I've known for a while; you guys only support aspec people when it's easy and convenient.

It's easy to support aspec people when it's J.K. Rowling being awful again. It's easy to support us when it's just reblogging an "aspec people are queer" post.

But what about when we are talking about amatonormativity and the relationship hierarchy? When we are discussing the enforcement of compulsory sexuality? When we are pushing for greater awareness and support for aspec identities that are not asexuality or aromanticism? When we are criticizing terminology that you use but harms us? Because I can tell you right now, I rarely see allo people engage with those posts.

Why do people hate asexuality (or any other aspec identity)? Because it challenges the societal norms that benefit them. And that is uncomfortable and scary. So they turn to hate and oppression in order to assure that the changes we push by just openly existing never happen.

That means that to be a good aspec ally, you can't just make a positivity post every now and again, and you can't just laugh about how stupid aphobes are. You have to openly challenge the societal norms that harm us, even if they benefit you. Including but not limited to:

The idea that romantic and sexual attraction is the default state of being (amatonormativity)

The idea that a romantic, sexual relationship completes a person

People in marriages receiving special privileges and benefits

The idea that platonic, familial, etc. attraction are default states of being

The idea that not feeling some form of attraction must be compensated for through another form of attraction

The idea that love (not just romantic) is inherently morally good, while not feeling love is inherently a moral failing

The idea that any one form of relationship is inherently more important or deeper than any other (relationship hierarchy)

The idea that any one thing makes someone human

The idea that not having sex is shameful or infantile

The idea that having sex without romantic love is callous

Gendered divides of sexual and romantic attraction

Other aspec people please feel free to add on/challenge any of this. Allo (not aspec) people please feel free to ask questions.

Additions:

Addition from @blkaroculture

Addition (in tags) from @fluffytimearts

Addition (in tags) from @cjreblogsthings

I've placed some resources for learning more about these topics under the cut.

Amatonormativity:

[PT: Amatonormativity:]

1. Amatonormativity Coining

2. Introduction to Amatonormativity

3. Challenging Amatonormativity

4. Effects of Amatonormativity and Compulsive Sexuality on Asexual and Aromantic College Students

5. Effects of Amatonormativity On Black, Polyamorous Men

6. Essay on Amatonormativity From a Aroallo, Loveless Perspective

Marriage Benefits:

[PT: Marriage Benefits:]

1. Article about Singlism and Marital Privilege

Other Aspec Identities:

[PT: Other Aspec Identities:]

1. Aplatonicism

2. Afamilialism

Loveless:

[PT: Loveless:]

1. Loveless articles on the AUREA website

2. Essay on Amatonormativity From a Aroallo, Loveless Perspective (repeat from Amatonormativity section)

3. Follow-up Essay on Lovelessness and Aroallo Antagonism

4. Results of a Survey of Loveless People (part 2 is linked instead of part 1 as part 1 is mostly demographic information)

5. Guide to Writing Loveless Characters (it focuses on fictional characters so should not be taken as a catch-all for real people, but it still has a ton of good information about lovelessness and loveless antagonism)

Compulsory Sexuality:

[PT: Compulsory Sexuality:]

1. Effects of Amatonormativity and Compulsive Sexuality on Asexual and Aromantic College Students (repeat from Amatonormativity section)

2. Breakdown of Compulsory Sexuality

Relationship Hierarchy vs Relationship Anarchy:

[PT: Relationship Hierarchy vs Relationship Anarchy:]

1. Relationship Anarchy Coining

2. Breakdown of Relationship Anarchy

3. Issues Presented by the Relationship Hierarchy

Oppression:

[PT: Oppression:]

1. Aphobia Masterpost

2. Asexual History and Oppression

3. Asexual Theory 101

Miscellaneous:

[PT: Miscellaneous:]

1. Research on Aromantics

2. Ace in the UK Research and Activism ft. Yasmin Benoit

3. Asexual History and Oppression (repeat from Oppression section)

4. Asexual Theory 101 (repeat from Oppression section)

Books and Video Essays:

[PT: Books and Video Essays:]

An Ace Discourse Retrospective by Jenny Geist

Ace: What Asexuality Reveals about Desire, Society, and the Meaning of Sex by Angela Chen

Refusing Compulsory Sexuality: A Black Asexual Lens on Our Sex-Obsessed Culture by Sherronda J. Brown

[angelheart-bunny]

people who deserve more respect and recognition:

intersex people

trans men

aromantic people

multigender people

people in qpr's

aplatonic people

[infiniteorangethethird]

it's aro week so here's a quick reminder to all my fellow aros that you don't have to "make up" for being aromantic. You don't have to love your friends twice as much to "make up" for romantic attraction you don't have to have a wide family you don't have to find The One in a qpr instead. If those things are something you want, go for it! But you shouldn't have to feel forced to go into any relationship just to make your aromanticism more palatable to outsiders.

Aromanticism isn't a hole that you need to fill. Sure it's a lack of romantic attraction but it's not a lack of self. You're already full and complete, whether or not you have more or less love in other areas of life. Do what you feel is right for you, not what others expect of you.

[sillylilneurodivergent]

Guys, it happened. I’m an

AAAAAA (aromantic, asexual, agender, with autism, adhd, & anxiety)

[dabouse]

happy pride to

male aspecs - your existence isn't sad, and you aren't an incel.

female aspecs - you aren't a prude

non-binary aspecs - you guys are real, seen, and valid

aspecs who are loveless - you aren't any less human

aspecs who are very loving - you aren't faking it

aroallos - you aren't just a whore

alloaces - you aren't just celibate

aplatonics - you're not any less valid than other aspecs

happy pride to all aspecs!

[transcendental-dustpan]

Hey if you’re aspec in any way and you are reading this…

You’re queer as fuckin’ hell and that’s epic, keep doing what you do. Y’all’re valid

[sysiheart]

Showing off some cat pride sticker designs from like 2ish years ago

(Quality is great cause these are like. screenshots of screenshots)

(colors arent 100% from the flags cause I like to play with colors and not getting hate crimed)

Asexual

Aromantic

Aroace

Demiace

Demiaro

Aegosexual

Aegoromantic

Aplatonic

Lesbian

Gay

Bi

Omni

Pan

Trans

Nonbinary

Genderqueer

Agender

Genderfluid

Demiwoman

Demiman

Rosboy

Xenogender

Polyamorous

Queerplatonic

Trans 4 Trans

Unlabeled

So many fucking cats

Also I am very much aware that theres like 1000000000000 flags missing, I designed these as my instagram followers requested them so I could order the specific amount of specific stickers and not waste my money

[aaa-battery-not-rechargeable]

A does not stand for ally, it stands for ASPECS. aros and aces and agenders and aplatonics and ASPECS damn it.

i will fucking swallow a motherfucker whole if I hear that argument again.

[januscorner]

Made these cus I was pissed, feel free to use with credit

[isabellascarlett1]

Happy Aro Week to:

- Aplatonic Aros 💗

- BIPOC Aros 💗

- Neurodivergent Aros 💗

- Aro Lesbians 💗

- Aro Gays 💗

- Non-monogamous Aros 💗

- Trans Aros 💗

- Romance repulsed Aros 💗

- Romance favorable Aros 💗

- AlloAros 💗

- AroAces 💗

- Aros in romantic relationships 💗

- Aros in Queerplatonic relationships 💗

- Hyperromantic Aros 💗

- All Aros 💞

[theexhaustedqueer]

Guys, there’s a really obvious enemy here and— Oh! What a surprise!

It isn’t each other.

[the-aaaaa-battery]

This is a reminder to queer people:

You are valid!!

You are valid if you are questioning/unsure

You are valid if you're trans but don't feel dysphoria

You are valid no matter what pronouns you use

You are valid if you're cis but not straight, or if you're straight but not cis

You are valid if you use lots and lots of labels, or if you prefer to remain unlabeled.

You. Are. Valid!

(P.S. I am one follower away from 10 followers! That's insane)

[genderqueerdykes]

happy first day of pride month 2024; please remember this month to hold your fellow queers up as high as you can, and to let them speak as loud as they need to. we are watching violent spikes in transphobia and trans panic this year as more and more bills and laws are proposed to make it difficult or impossible for trans people to medically or socially transition in the United States. we are seeing an all time high in trans panic in general- i have witnessed it personally in my own city, people freaking out about even the slightest gender non conformity. gay, lesbian, bisexual, pansexual and other queer folks are fighting for their rights in places like Russia and Africa. queerphobia is at a peak right now

no more petty arguing about who has it better or worse- we are upholding the entire queer community this year. your brothers, sisters and siblings with identities you don't understand need space this year. boygirls, lesboys, gaybians, fagdykes, bisexual gays and lesbians, transmasc and male lesbians, transfem and female gays all need space. intersex people need space. all trans folks, trans women, trans men, non binary people, genderfluid people, bigender and multigender people, xenogender people, and people with the weirdest genders you've ever seen need a platform to speak. nonhuman queers, disabled queers, neurodivergent queers need space. people of color with cultural identities like two-spirit folk need space. bisexuals and pansexuals have to lift each other up high and scream for each others rights. aromantics, asexuals, agender people and other aspec folks need to be heard.

now more than ever we need to unite and make our community stronger than ever. we need each other right now. let's be here for each other. even if we don't fully understand one another, it doesn't matter. we're siblings, family, whatever you'd like to call it- we are part of the same beautiful rainbow and it's time to act like it. i appreciate every member of my queer family, let's take care of each other this Pride. we owe it to each other.